xstillbornx (xstillbornx) wrote,
xstillbornx
xstillbornx

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I wish that I could disappear. Unzip my skin and leave it here.

my chest feels hollow all the sudden.
funny how in the right state of mind it's so easy to bring it all back.
a faint smell of lilac as my car screams down the freeway
gas light on, 20 miles to go.
a sideward glance on an empty road.
a paper.
a little fucking scrap, torn from a notebook so long ago
and planted
like an old bomb unexploded after so many years
so many wars
just waiting to burst on its surprised discoverer.
funny how fourteen characters can bring the world crashing down.


::::::::
i don't think i've done this before, but i found the original lyrics to a song i was working on..if i already posted this long ago and have forgotten, my apologies.
but i thought those familiar with the song might find this interesting.

elegantly fade...

i don't know where we're all going soon.
our structure intertwining - then pushing me from you -
farther - elegantly stray.
we're weaving fateful thread, we follow courses due -
delicately slipping, immersed in poison truth
(silence)
and there's nothing left to do

watch me die, die for you
feel me in your memory despair
longing for a second sensual air
scream goodbye ignore heard for them
clench, release, a touch, a breaking hymn
careful please, not much further i can bend.

and i feel you, part of me.
sinking in the evernothing
wasteland glistening
dreaming with you; listen:
borne away -
fall away -

i'll falter and destroy this nightmare too (two?)
the thing that's dying, the thing i have to do
listen - shy away
conceal my meaning lock it up inside
lucidly screaming - why this pain and why goodbye?

[we]dance alone in shadow despair
nothing certain, nothing. Knowledge shown
fateful burden, tired mind alone -


--You don't know what you've put me through. That's okay, I've forgiven you. But in some way, hope it fucks with you
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